Healing Too Slow

I don’t think I can recall a situation where I have ever been more frustrated than now.

I’m not a patient person. No way no how.  Patience is not a virtue I possess.  Maybe that explains the exasperation and frustration which I experience currently in my period of convalescence.

It has been nearly ten weeks since my surgery. I expected to feel better by now. My body doesn’t understand this. I have had nothing but setbacks. The setbacks started when I got my staples removed and a stitch popped immediately.  By the end of the day two more had popped. I got nursing care in the home within two days.

I have had unexplained pain that just wont quit. I was hospitalized and tests were performed. Nothing conclusive was discovered. Conclusion: not from the surgery; referred to Pain and Symptom management.

I have just fought off a bladder infection. It was quite bad. Never expected to get one.

I felt it was okay for me to move some books closer to my room. I didn’t feel any pain so I thought I was okay.

It was until about 90 min after, when leaning over my desk chair to reach for my medicine, that I felt a pop in my stomach. I knew immediately that I had pulled, torn or ripped a muscle.

The pain was quite intense through the evening. All due to my impatience and thinking I was healed enough to do this.

I feel like I am healing too slowly. And it is frustrating. I would give my right arm to be able to get back to my normal activities. But I am not strong enough.

When WILL I be strong enough???!!!  The 15th of NEVER?

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